"The kiss began much the same as usual--Edward was as careful as ever, and my heart began to overreact like it always did. And then something seemed to change. Suddenly his lips became much more urgent, his free hand twisted in my hair and held my face securely to his. And, though my hands tangled in his hair too, and though I was clearly beginning to cross his cautious lines, for once he didn't stop me. His body was cold through the thin quilt, but I crushed myself against him eagerly.
When he stopped it was abrupt; he pushed me away with gentle, firm hands.
I collapsed back onto my pillow, gasping, my head spinning. Something tugged at my memory, elusive, on the edges."
My Response:
Yesterday was just like any other normal day, except yesterday consisted of hurt, worry, and aloneness. I was starting to overreact like I always do, when suddenly, something changed and hit me in the face. My tears stopped, my hammering heart slowed down, and my then clouded mind opened up. I stood up from my bed, and got my journal out to write about you. I wrote that I need to stop worrying because I'll always have you to run to, no matter what I'm going through.
When I stopped writing I put my journal away, got into bed, asked God for strength. I asked that he'd help me be strong through the rest of this year and all of next. I'll need it when you're gone, and can't get by without it. When I finished praying, I remembered something you said to me. You said, "Be optimistic.'"
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